Today, I am going to reveal some covert signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist. These are things that narcissists are guilty of, but many people do not notice these things until it’s too late.
The covert narcissist is the most slippery of the bunch, as they tend to present a clean, squeaky image. But they do expose themselves more often than not. The problem is they are really good at downplaying their actions and intents, and some would also use humor to eliminate any concerns. But also, if you call them out on something where they clearly tripped up, they would guilt-trip you and make you feel as if your assessment of them was incorrect and how hurt they are that you would think of them like that. So that lying, manipulative tongue of theirs always saves the day. But as you will see, it gets them into trouble as well.
The points I’m going to highlight today are based on my personal observation. If someone is guilty of most of these or all of them, even if they are not a narcissist, they are toxic and should be avoided. These are signs you will be able to pick up on without even needing to be in a close personal relationship with them. There are seven subtle signs, which I have put together, which must not be taken in isolation. A person must have at least five of the seven.
1. Gossiping.
Narcissists love drama, and they enjoy talking smack about someone else. They do it to so discord and confusion. They would gossip with just about anyone who would listen. Some are very sly in how they go about it, but they do it—not just the female ones; the male narcissists do it as well.
2. They are very judgmental.
The second sign is that they are very judgmental. They look down on others and can be very harsh in their criticism of others. They prefer to judge and look down on someone instead of helping them. The narcissist feels that others are inferior, and they make it clear in the remarks that they make.
3. Dismissive of other people’s problems/issues.
The third sign is that they will dismiss your problems or issues as insignificant. It’s because they don’t care. They may appear to be listening, but they are just waiting for you to finish talking so that they can drop a few positive words like, “Everything is going to work out fine; don’t worry about it,” so that they can just move on. To confirm this, they will not follow up to find out if you ever got the problem resolved, unless you bring it up to them, of course. It’s because the narcissist probably does not even remember, and for sure, they definitely do not care.
4. Easily offended.
The fourth sign is that there tends to be a lot of misunderstandings. This happens because narcissists are insecure, and they take offense very easily. So you may end up having to apologize, or you may realize other people around you are having to apologize to the narcissist in order to appease their ego.
5. They love to exaggerate.
The fifth sign is that they tend to exaggerate, which is just another word for lying. But this may be the closest you get to spotting a narcissist from a distance. You and they can witness the same event, but if they retell it, they will embellish the truth to make it more dramatic or fantastic than it really was. They cannot seem to retell things exactly as they happened. That’s why I have concluded that they are delusional.
6. Use humor to devalue.
The sixth sign is that they will make fun of sensitive matters. Narcissists lack empathy, so they are not able to consider the true hurt they cause when they do this. The narcissist takes joy in other people’s misery, and they cover it up with humor, saying that you are being too sensitive. They don’t care how embarrassing or hurtful it may have been to you. As far as they are concerned, it was just a joke.
7. They have double standars.
This follows into the seventh sign, where they think people are too sensitive. People who take offense at what they say or do are too sensitive. They do not want to own up to the hurt that they’ve caused; it’s always the other person’s fault for being too sensitive. Narcissists discredit our feelings.
So those are my covert signs for spotting a narcissist. They lack empathy, and a lot of the points I’ve raised are actually subtle signs that someone doesn’t really have empathy. So if someone you were wondering about appears to be a narcissist but you are not sure, look out for these seven subtle signs as well.
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